Real Live Update

So I haven't really said too much on here lately. There have been Random posts from time to time with Random dogs, Random birthdays, etc., but not much of substance. Maybe you'd like to know what I've been up to since Kansas City, eh? At least by now maybe some people's love has grown cold of this blog and it will allow for me to be more personal and uncaring of the way things come out. I hope so.

So let's take it back a bit. My trip to Kansas City was really fun. I spent a lot of time with Brigitte and her friends and we even got free tickets to a Kansas City Royals game. It was fun to see a game at a stadium outside of WI because I don't know if I ever have before (with baseball, that is). I also went on a 'wild' motorcycle ride, which was a blast! I had some good time in the prayer room with the Lord, but I have to say looking back that I was kind of trying to go there to fix myself, I think. If we're honest, sometimes we just walk with Jesus because we know we should. We want to because we know deep down inside there's a passion, but he's just not fitting right in our lives like he once was. I think I was trying to get all convicted. I'm not saying it was an all together bad idea. When we are not feeling like walking the walk as hardcore as we once were, it's good to try and get out of your routine and do something about it. Thankfully that didn't 'fix' me though. I'll explain that comment in a bit.

What else? Well, I guess since then I've experienced how much work picks up during the school year, so I find myself very busy at work most of the time. This can be a big burden and a downer at times. I've also had a Board meeting in there, so that was craziness in terms of work load, but cool. As mentioned in previous posts, it was in Washington, D.C. and I took my mom for the first few days. We had a good time and it was a vacation we'll never forget because it was ours. Just ours. :-) I should post up the sweet picture we got in front of the White House. GW was in it and everything. No he wasn't... I just thought it'd be fun to say that. ha ha So anyway... I'm pretty busy and I think it will stay that way till the holidays.

I heard about an internship at the House of Prayer for All Nations, which was great because another program I was interested in doing at my church wasn't going to work out in my schedule this fall. It's been amazing. Through it I've realized more of why I'm here and I've stopped pouting about the fact that I wanted to move to Kansas City. God has really shown me how this was all part of his wonderful plan. I finally feel like I'm so glad to be here! :-) Not necessarily all the time, but it's so much better now. Now I just need a few more friends. (-:
I also began a dance ministry with my new friend Naomi and some students she knows. That's been awesome and God has been pulling us out of what's comfortable and it is really healing.

So yeah... that's a lot of it. My intership is really where I'm meeting God and the House of Prayer is where I feel he is calling me in Madison. Aside from that, the Lord's been working in me in the secret place of my heart. I'm realizing more and more the importance of dying to yourself and setting up guards in the places where you are tempted to sin (yeah, even the 'little' ones) and where you are vulnerable to attack. I feel I had been lazy about this before. I tell you, if we will not resolve to contend for intimacy with Christ, it will not just happen to us. He longs to be there and he is there with us, but we need to die to and fast from the things of this world or this life will consume us instead. It's a day-to-day thing. That's why I'm glad God didn't just 'fix' me when I was at IHOP - because I needed to meet him in the ordinary, the day-to-day. I needed to be more serious about the living it out part. I'm not saying I'm there yet, but He is so faithful and wonderful to show us THE WAY. Sometimes people think about all that they'd give up if they followed Jesus with a resolve, an uncompromised fire in their heart and it's hard. We wonder why we have to give up these things that don't seem to matter all that much. I think that way sometimes, too, but my curiousity has gotten the best of me - what would I give up if I didn't follow him that way? What would life be like if I just tried it for a while? I'll tell you what... maybe people would meet their Maker, maybe people would see their Maker and fall in love, maybe nations would change, the sick and dying wouldn't be sick and wouldn't be dying anymore, maybe the hungry would actually get food, and maybe a motherless child would find a home? Isn't it worth a try? To God be the Glory... to God be the Everything. Just give him everything... I guess that's what's deep in my heart and I'm just getting to the point where I want it to be real, not just a desire.

For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith to faith; as it is written, "BUT THE RIGHTEOUS man SHALL LIVE BY FAITH."

~Romans 1:16-17